14 October, 2011

Sin of the Self-Conscious

We all do it. We all think it. We all fight it. Are we enough? Can we do it? What will they think of me? Will I fail again??

In this society, in this day and age, the battle to prove one-self is a fight that leaves many of us drained. We want to be bigger, faster, stronger, smarter, prettier, sexier, richer... We want to be on top. We want God to be proud of us, we want the Church to like us, we want to be right... We, we, we...

I battle these things all the time. In the natural, I have a record. I have done a lot of really dumb stuff. I have given Jesus a really bad name - both in and out of Church. I have hurt my friends, I have hurt my family, I have crushed my wife. I have cursed God to His face, lost faith, held grudges of all kinds against all people. I have been racist, insensitive, arrogant, depressed, hateful, hurtful, destructive - you name it, I probably did it. I have been the pinnacle of failure. The Church sees me as sinful and weak. And therefore God sees me as... Holy.

That's why He is God, and the Church is... Nevermind. Yesterday during my daily Scripture reading I came across this simple verse that catapulted my thinking to another level as the Holy Spirit shed His Light on His Word: "Do not call to mind the former things, or ponder things of the past" (Isaiah 43:18). In order for any of us to grow into full Christian maturity, we must learn to learn to set-aside all our person problems and look at ourselves the way Jesus does (the real Jesus, not the jerk a lot of religious minded people portray to the world). You are commanded not to look at your past failures. You are commanded not to look at your short-comings. You are commanded to look at your self through the eyes of the Word. Do it.


I'm trying... I know, and that is why it is so hard. There is not "try." There is only "do" (don't you dare quote Yoda on me...). The Lord pinned it very sternly in my Spirit, "you cannot have these self-conscious issues!" I promptly wrote that down in my journal, and then the Light came on when I saw it: self-conscious. Christian people should not be self-conscious. In fact, it is a sin. It is pride. It is you (or me) being so caught up with yourself and your issues that they take a front seat to everything else. What happen to "dying to self" (Matt 16:24; Gal 2:20)? What happened to "turning the other cheek"? What happened to being kingdom-minded? That should be our primary focus - not our own poor self-esteem. You focus on the things of God, and your self-esteem will wither away. We all have issues, we all have "stuff." But the time for focusing on those issues is over. It is time to see yourself as God sees you, and to let that be the only opinion that matters.

Anytime any of those thoughts of failure, unworthiness, unprettiness (I made that word up), or whatever come to your mind, do what the word says - cast them down (2Cor. 10:5). "I know but..." No more ifs, ands, or buts about it. It is a command. Not all of His commands are easy, but every one of them is more than doable. You have all the help you are ever going to get. Jesus said His grace is sufficient for these things (2Cor 12:9). And this is the exact subject He was referring to: a nagging devil causing trouble in your mind. He is telling you to take care of it. Cast it out of your mind and move on. You can do it! Jesus has placed His Holy Spirit within you. Do you really think you need any more help than that?! He said that the Spirit will take from Him and give it unto you. And then Jesus went on to say ALL THE FATHER HAS has been given to Him (John 16:12-15) That's a lot of stuff! This is doable. Look at yourself through the eyes of Jesus: more than a conqueror, the righteousness of God, heir according to the promise, most Blessed, smart, strong, beautiful, successful, one-of-a-kind. All the tools are there, all the power is yours. It is only as difficult as you make it...

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